Tuesday, March 31, 2015

Mental Rollerskates

Day 16 and happy to report some relief from turbulence.

Excerpt from an email to my boyfriend:

"Day 16 meditation, trying to silence Chatty Cathy; I think I'm starting to send her by on roller skates instead of taking her to dinner in my brain."

Maybe allowing thoughts to pass makes room to have more thoughts. I should allow all of them pass through. It's seldom good ideas are completely forgotten. I keep ongoing lists in my phone for nearly everything-from good jokes/stories to songs I would like to sing at Karaoke (Let the bodies hit the floor-Drowning Pool, I like the way you work it-Blackstreet, I hate everything about you-Three Days Grace). Perhaps show some restraint and dash to the phone list after sessions.

I'm having a few moments of real nothingness during meditation-emphasis on moments. Milliseconds where I've noticed "nothing" and immediately my brain will shout out, "I'm DOING IT, Oh no! I'm not anymore!!!!"

Other things that have contributed to a more positive mindset:
1. Re-entering my work/life routine
2. Coming closer to resolutions for upcoming changes

I find that limbo regarding the future is much worse than the outcome-even negative outcomes.

3. Setting a firm practice routine-I've got an exciting performance opportunity on the horizon and I want to be deliberate and specific in preparation. The Wooden on Leadership is a straight-forward reminder on what I need to do to achieve my personal and professional goals.

Currently reading/browsing: Wooden on Leadership
Chez Panisse-Vegetables
This Financial Blog

I spent much of last week catastrophizing events. I see that about 30% of it was unhelpful, and while some of this energy helped me consider solutions, there was also excessive worrying.
Mark Twain quote discovered in Arianna Huffington's Thrive:

“I've lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.”



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